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'Lampoon' Takes 'Time' to Parody; Humor Substituted for News Weekly

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

The Lampoon is putting the finishing touches on its next issue, a parody of Time Magazine that will appear May 10.

The editors have concerned their spoof on Time's style and content, and hope, according to Richard A. Spencer '66, president of the Lampoon, that "this issue does much to reform Time."

When told of the Lampoon's parody last night, Otto Fuerbringer, managing editor of Time, said, "Of course we're flattered. But tell them to make it good. There are a lot of parodies of Time being sold as serious publications."

Some features of the Time-Lampoon:

* The cover is a photograph of General Maxwell Green, portrayed by Lampoon janitor Elmer Green, and a Vietnamese god riding in a rowboat searching for Saigon.

* Under the head Foreign Relations in the Nation section one reads the narration of the week's events after Vietnam disappeared without warning-the first country to do so since Bosnia-Herzogovina. Despite this event, the story continues, the U.S. and China have refused to change their policies towards Vietnam. The U.S. has continued to bomb the navigational points of bridges and railroads, while the Chinese have not ceased pouring troops into the new Laotian Gulf.

* For those who like to read the People Items, the 'Poon writes: "Banners waving, confetti streaming, cannons booming, and thousands of broadly smiling Washingtonians on official holiday (their second in as many weeks) crowding the elm-lined length of Pennsylvania Avenue in the abnormal (for Washington) 60 degree weather, the stately pearl gray Lincoln Continental limousine, dappled sunlight glinting from its vinyl roof, preceded by a 50-girl corps of the fairest drum-majorettes in a city renowned for them (having produced eight national winners since 1955), sandwiched between sixteen marching bands (especially flown in for the occasion from Bancouver) playing the works of John Sousa and Edward Elgar while live television cameras broadcast the parade across the nation and beamed it to Europe via Telstar."

* In the Milestones section, the Lampoon has noted the death of one "Theophilius Crim, noted Long Island eccen- tric, who enjoyed having rubbish strewn artistically around his 5000 acre South Hampton estate, who is survived by wife Iss. and son Whippet, and whose chief caretaker, when asked why work was stopped after the death announcement, replied, "We've decided to leave the job of disseminating trash to the CRIMSON" of gout."

Since this is all that's funny, you don't need to buy the magazine

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