The only situation in which someone should get scarlet fucking fever is on the Oregon Trail.
What you have to understand is that I don’t play football, but I’ve touched down everywhere. Likewise, I don’t play baseball, but I’ve hit a home run everywhere. I’ve been to countries and cities I can’t pronounce and places on the globe I didn’t know existed.
Listen, I Don’t Think It Was Unreasonable For Me To Wear My Latex Bodysuit to Adult Night at Legoland
I assumed we were all here for the same reason—to capital-D Discover the power of sensual touch against the backdrop of thousands of tiny plastic bricks.