News

Harvard Alumni Email Forwarding Services to Remain Unchanged Despite Student Protest

News

Democracy Center to Close, Leaving Progressive Cambridge Groups Scrambling

News

Harvard Student Government Approves PSC Petition for Referendum on Israel Divestment

News

Cambridge City Manager Yi-An Huang ’05 Elected Co-Chair of Metropolitan Mayors Coalition

News

Cambridge Residents Slam Council Proposal to Delay Bike Lane Construction

TESTING FOR TOUGHNESS

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

Heart-rending stories of men who broke teeth or cracked their jaws in futile attacks on a restaurant steak will soon be no more, if the government succeeds in perfecting instruments with which to measure the toughness of beef. The Department of Agriculture pointed out that tender meat is worth more than tough meat (which sounds reasonable enough), and has accordingly requested the Bureau of Standards to devise suitable mechanical tests.

It was easy to develop tests to compute the strength of egg-shells, but beef has so far been harder. The Bureau expects to develop a machine to measure the tensile and tortional strains of each little fiber of beef, but is careful to check the findings by the teeth of expert beef eaters. Just what use will be made of these tests the Department of Agriculture does not state. To the casual observer it would seem that all the packers and restaurateurs would rise in a body to protest against their ancient prerogative of serving tough steak. What is more likely, however, is that the proprietors of food shops will hasten to proclaim that "The Government Says our Steaks are Tender."

This reform will be eagerly looked for by restaurant habitues, but there is still one evil which cries for reformation. Some compulsive power must insist that steaks be large enough to be visible to the naked eye.

Want to keep up with breaking news? Subscribe to our email newsletter.

Tags