Harvard Quiz Bowl Meeting Minutes

President: Maybe this whole scandal will be a good thing after all. We’re getting the attention we deserve.

Food and Drink

Drinking Game of Thrones

Whether you’re a dedicated fan who attended the early screening in the Science Center or you’re just watching the show ...


It's Really Okay If...

• You once offered your resume to the guy who opened the door of the Owl, thinking it was OCS.

Department of Athletics

FM Satire: Mock Trial Victory Allows Nation to Realize Harvard is Good at More Than Just Basketball

In a shocking upset over number one seed Yale, Harvard proved its worth at something besides basketball at the 2013 National Collegiate Mock Trial Tournament last week.


Call-a-thon in the Style of...

A Quentin Tarantino Character [Gun pointed at phone] Quentin Tarantino Character: Congratu-f#!@ing-lations, motherf$#@er. [Hangs up]


What Would Oprah Do?

Oprah is heading to Harvard Yard on May 30 to impart words of wisdom to the class of 2013. In the meantime, FM looks to Oprah’s Twitter for advice to solve our day-to-day problems.


Non-Thesis-Writing Senior Experiences a Totally Normal Week

“It was a totally ordinary Tuesday night,” said John. “I was watching seasons two through five of ‘The Office’ on Netflix, and suddenly my roommates came in, all excited. They were way happier than I’ve seen them in months. It was weird.”


Tinder Obituary

Last night, after several weeks in isolation, Tinder passed peacefully away in its sleep with a rosy glow on his ...

House Life

Housing Day Meeting Minutes

HoCo Chair: Dammit, no! We talked about this! Junior: Sorry, I forgot. First we get them to make out with each other!

House Life

How a Real Harvard Student Parties

Friday Night:

Gender and Sexuality

Rant: Pockets

By my count, the clothes that I’m currently wearing have six pockets between them. Are any of them useful? Absolutely ...

Student Jobs

FM Imagines: A Recommendation Letter

Occasionally, faculty members ask students to draft a recommendation letter that they will then sign on. FM imagines one of ...


Spot The Imposter: Which Thesis Titles Aren’t Real?

Ever listen to a senior explain his or her thesis and think, there’s no way in hell you can write 70 pages about that? Use your sleuthing skills to guess which of these thesis titles could have won a Hoopes Prize, and which are simply FM’s comic gold.


Venn Diagram: Milkshake and Harlem Shake


House Life

15 Ways to Say "No" to a Potential Blockmate

1. It’s not you. It’s me.