One Alternative to Recruiting

Dedicated to the Class of 2000 (or anyone else with stirrings of anxiety because it seems the only available post-college paths are medical school, law school, Ph.D. candidacies and, of course, recruiting):

Ah, yes. Recruiting. The ultimate plan "C" for any senior who couldn't bring themselves to prepare for the LSAT games section, who neglected to stab at their typewriters preparing graduate school applications, who has enough business savvy and diligence to enter data into spreadsheets for hours upon end and who wants "work experience."

Goldman Sachs, Chase, CIBC, JP Morgan--they each swarm the Faculty Club and posh hotels in the Square, lure you with free key chains and fresh caviar and sell you a life "leading to results" and a career path that you can "build on your own." You spend two years of your life in the hectic metropolis that is Manhattan behind a spreadsheet 12 hours a day, with the hope of "turbo-charging" your career.

As appealing as this lifestyle may be, if the thought of recruiting makes you cringe, take to heart that there is another more attractive, or at least more comfortable, job which proffers a similarly humbling experience that most Harvard seniors somehow neglect to consider: that of a Hollywood personal assistant. Eyebrow-raising and worthy of mockery? Sure. Once referred to as demeaning girl or guy "Fridays?" Of course. But drastically different from the illustrious fruits of recruiting? Hardly.

Investment banking supposedly develops management skills. But what better way to hone one's organizational abilities than to organize and run the household of a successful entrepreneur, practically a mini-corporation in itself? From paying house bills, to managing the staff, to scheduling facial and veterinarian appointments, the Hollywood assistant not only have responsibility of I-banking recruits, but a variety of activity to amuse themselves with as well.

Creativity is expected to exude from I-bank recruits, adding that touch of finesse to the rigors of consulting and researching. But personal assistants display as much, if not more, ingenuity in their own jobs. For example, one personal assistant to a handful of Hollywood luminaries explained to the New York Times that her job requires the "innate ability to get things done. If the star asks you for peanut butter from Japan, you don't ask, 'How do I get it?' You just say, 'O.K.'" If that's not resourcefulness, I don't know what is. And you can't get that type of real world experience sitting at an office desk.

Consulting is a popular choice among the plethora of jobs offered by investment bank recruiters. But personal assistants are looked to for advice as well, from creating wills to designing bathrooms. Again, similar concept but more variety and consequently, more satisfaction with the Hollywood option. Check, check.

Need more convincing? Salaries of personal assistants usually fall between $50,000 and $80,000, but can swell beyond $100,000. Other perks often include medical insurance, paid vacation, free travel, a warm and temperate California climate and a front-row seat to how the wealthy live. Can't stand meetings? The Board of the Association of Celebrity Personal Assistants meet but once a month to discuss and exchange ideas about their jobs, and there is just one seminar planned for the near future, about examining security and celebrity stalking.

Sounds like quite the windfall, does it not? True, some specialized skills are seen as advantageous, but who doesn't want to earn their helicopter pilot license anyway? The only problem is that one of the most important characteristics of a personal assistant is that the boss and his needs come first, while your deflated ego comes a paltry second.