Bogus Professor Dupes Freshmen Who Walk into His Den by Mistake

For some weeks now, R. Thurston Lowndes described by friends as sometime professor of English and equally sometime professor of Mandarin, has advised freshmen, accepted their themes, issued them "personal permits" to the library, and tried to pour orange juice into their gaping mouths.

Lowndes has conducted this benevolent patriarchalism from his residence at 20 Holyoke Street. Members of the Class of '55, bringing in their General Education themes, were awed by the Professor's wide knowledge of Oriental subjects, his impromptu concern over their respective futures, and his hospitality in trying to spoon them orange juice.

The freshmen are wiser now. They have learned that Lowndes is not Lowndes at all, but an enthusiastic, if misguided, graduate student; that Mandarin professors aren't always, and most important: the General Education office is at 20 Holyoke House.