Christina S.N. Lewis

Psychic on CSL “Aquarius is the most psychic of signs,” she said to Christina as she reached out to the
By The CRIMSON Staff

“Aquarius is the most psychic of signs,” she said to Christina as she reached out to the girl’s hand. “Pisces, which is what I am is also good, but most psychics are Aquarius.” Christina looked blank. Mary shifted in her seat, closed her eyes and concentrated on the matter at hand: “At the end of the day, are you totally spent?” The girl nodded yes. “You need to take breaks,” Mary continued. “Naps, maybe? Now, pick ten cards.”

She picked. “Hmm. I see three 15 minutes of fame for you.” Christina got excited: that’s 45 minutes! “You will have three chances at immortality. First, marriage. You’re good with practical things, but when it comes to your love life you’re not even in the right ballpark!” Mary paused for a moment then turned to look Christina right in the eyes: “Are you ever perky?” She queried in solemn tones. “Um, well, maybe after a few drinks.” Christina shrugged. Mary looked displeased. Christina decided to start keeping her comments to herself. “Well, you’re drawn to men who make you feel perky, mischievous. You’re going to marry someone rich and famous. [I knew it!] It will be a quickie marriage. [Oh, no!] In and out. As soon as you get into it, you’ll be like a rocket trying to get out of it! [Oh no!] But it will teach you a lesson that you had to learn for yourself. [Oh, okay.] Marriage brings you fame. [Cool!] It will catapult you to life in the fast lane. [Really cool!] I see fine hotels [But do I not have a house?]—very upper crust. [Okay.] And you’re wearing a ball gown [Okay.] and a mink stole. [.]—It’s quite a nice life! [Thanks]. But it won’t last...[Oh, no!] The guy’s a real schmucko...[Oh, okay.] Don’t feel bad. [Okay.] Sometimes you just have to get that out of your system. [True that.] You’ll never want for lovers. [Amen!] Homeostasis for you will always involve a lover. [Preach on!] The second brush with fame happens to you in Asia. [Gasp! The Luce!] Two of these cards require moving or travel. [Or maybe the Sheldon, Shaw or Trustman!] You will find fame while living on foreign soil. [Here’s to hoping.] You’re also going to have a baby late [uh oh, how late?], around 43 years old. [Oh. That’s late.] I see...[Oh God...] four kids for you. [As a divorcee?!] You’ll have your first baby at the age of 29. [Great.] The third brush with fame...[This better be good.] I see you investing money well. [Well, I was the best in Ms. Ring’s class at balancing a checkbook.] You’re going to find success in investment management. [Hmm, I look good in suits.] You have good instincts. [Thanks.] You’re going to become a mogul. [A mogul?] Yes! A mogul. [Yes! I can afford daycare!]”

VCH on CSL

With the posture of Miss America, the etiquette know-how of Miss Manners and the body of an athletic super model, Christina S.N. Lewis fills a room with presence. When she is agitated, she never yells or shouts. Rather, her head snaps up, her eyes glow with a level-headed intelligence and she states her beliefs clearly, knowing that she is right. Always. Her upbringing as a proper Parisian socialite has given her the poise to handle herself in any situation and to know what wine she should be drinking at any given time.

Her cool demeanor is matched only by her aesthetic perfection. Every time she slips off her coat, a chorus of “ooohs” and “ahhhs” inevitably follows. Even at 5 or 6 a.m., when the rest of the human species is droopy and stained, she can make jeans and a Rainbow Brite t-shirt look like an evening gown.

Christina could end up back on the upper east side with her Dalton classmates eventually, but she has too much of a sense of adventure to head back home immediately. Unstoppable with her trusty Nikon N80, her future is in capturing the world on film. Her travels will take her around the globe and into the arms of a series of sophisticated men a la the adventures of Shutterbabe—but not as slutty.

A few years later, she’ll be walking briskly through the rooms of her highly acclaimed Parisian gallery, adjusting the occasional frame and ordering the caterers to hurry with the hors d’ouevres. Everything will have to be perfect for the opening of “Panopticon,” a show certain to wow reviewers and bring her to the peak of her career. The photos will include the work of luminaries in the photo world, including Simon Eagleton, her raffish ex-husband from her days as a photojournalist in Laos. That will all be over by now of course. He had taken a few nice pictures, but Christina needed an artist. She found what she needed in Jean-Claude, a devastatingly handsome man she met in a cafe in Paris during a trip to visit her former chef. They did not even exchange words; they just gazed into each other’s eyes. The two eloped in Monte Carlo and honeymooned in Marrakesh, much to the chagrin of Christina’s mom, who had been hoping for a lavish celebration in the Hamptons. They humored her however, by inviting her to an endless stream of grand festivities in their spectacular home—modeled after the pyramid of the Louvre. Jean-Claude’s work as a noted mime will pose a few problems in their relationship, but Christina will win every dispute by countering his “I’m-stuck-in-a-box” gestures with lucid arguments. Their two children (one boy and one girl) were growing up bilingual with the ability to speak English and mime in French. In the little free time Christina does have, she likes to shop, train for marathons and cure world hunger. It’s a good life.

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